You ARE Enough

I think there is always someone's expectations you always want to fulfill. I believe we have all had the moment where they're not happy with you, but you feel like you've tried your hardest.
School? Not good enough grades, not hard enough classes, or you don't even try.
Friends? They're not nice, they're too different, or maybe even every one of your friends has to be approved of.
Family? You don't help enough, you're not nice enough, you're just not enough.
I feel like I've heard these all from different people, and it kills me. There is always a time where you feel like you've given your all, but they just don't see it. We can't just listen to the outside voices, screaming at us that our best isn't good enough. We need to listen to the voice inside of us, screaming at us to continue going strong. Giving up just can't be an option in this world, someone out there needs you in the future which could be tomorrow, a week away, a month away, or even years away, but that doesn't matter. We are important. I AM enough. You ARE enough.

I love you, your Heavenly Father, and Christ love you. 

Please remember this.
If I can start to believe this and begin to change, then so can you.

it's quite simple

it's quite simple.
I can do hard things. No matter the problem, I can do it. With the Lord on my side, who can be against me?
I guess it has taken me almost 16 years to actually understand what it meant to be able to do hard things. But now that I understand that I can do anything or be anything I want to with the Lord on my side, life isn't going to get me down anymore.
I'll come up on top. No matter what is happening to me right now, I know life is meant to be enjoyed. I love the Lord and he loves me, you, and everyone.
Enjoy life, it does get better.

Choices..

Choices.. We all have them. We all hate them sometimes. Everyday we have to make choices that might change our lives forever.. Like, maybe you could have smiled at someone that you didn't know or you could have gone and visited someone who needed a friend. Maybe you over thought something or didn't think about your decision enough. Maybe you said something you regretted or you didn't say enough.
I think that life is going to give us a crossroads everyday. We have to think ahead of time and think about what choice is going to work for us that day. Maybe in a year we're gonna regret that decision, but why live life with regret?
Be happy with your choices, even if they're the wrong ones. You can't go back and change them, you can only continue forward.

Have the courage to stand up for people, don't let others be put down while you're standing there. Stand for what's right. Let your light shine.Be Christ's hand on this Earth. He needs us.

"Arise and shine forth that thy light be a standard for the nations." - D&C 115:5

Stop before it gets too late.

Whenever someone says, "You're so gorgeous!" "You're sooo skinny!" "I love your eyes!" "I love your hair!" I always turn around, look to my right, or left to see if they're actually talking to me. It's horrible. I always tell other girls that they're beautiful. I don't know how I can do it when I don't even believe it myself.  I know we've all experienced that moment of self-doubt. Doubt that destroys your day, your mood, and your smile for the day.
We all have a bad habit of comparing ourselves to others, and you know what? STOP. You are you. I think that there will always be someone prettier, someone skinnier, someone smarter, but there will never be another one of you. I went through a horrible time of self-loathing. I hated myself. I had to stop or I was going to self-destruct.
We all hope that that one boy will come along and make us feel beautiful. But what's gonna happen when he leaves? Are you going to start thinking you're beautiful? Or are you going to go down a steeper slope? I promise, you don't need a boy to believe that you're beautiful. I know it helps, but if you ever need to hear that you're beautiful, COME TALK TO ME.

• Don't ever shut down.
• Don't ever stop eating.
• Don't ever start self harming.
• Don't ever stop smiling.
• Don't ever start putting yourself down or others.

Proverbs 3:15 - She is more precious than rubies: and all the things thou canst desire are not to be compared unto her.
     You're all worth more than you think. You are priceless to God. 

Stop before it's too late. I want to help! If you ever think about self-harming or to stop eating, don't do it. It's such a hard path to stop going down. I promise, I know. I know that it doesn't sound easy, and that it might take a long time. But no matter how many compliments you receive, if you don't believe that you're beautiful, they're a waste. For once, if you're hurting, help yourself. Talk to someone. Please. I want to help all those that I can. I know what's it like to feel all alone.
Let's all get healthy together. I love you all. It gets better.

When things change..

Things have changed so much for me lately. I've been so angry at people or more specifically a person. I'm angry at them for leaving me when they said they never would. I'm angry at them for forgetting all of our memories. More importantly, I'm mad at myself for not fixing it when I should have.
Have you ever wished someone the best even if they're happier without you? Have you ever just wanted to cry because you miss someone so much? Have you ever just looked at someone and tears flood into your eyes because you hate the way things ended? Have you ever just stared at your best friend and wondered, "What the heck happened between us?" Everyday for me for the past week.
I can't even put into words how disappointed I am with the both of us. We let BOYS get in-between us. How stupid is that. We don't even like the same boy, we both don't like the boy the other girl likes. How ridiculous is that. How ridiculous is that we both feel like we're getting replaced. I find this extremely annoying and not worth the pain. I don't understand now a days why people can't swallow their pride and just apologize.
I'm sorry goes a long way. Talking about it goes a long way. Being there for each other goes a long way. No more of this talking on Facebook crap, talk in REAL LIFE. Nothing is ever going to change if you just talk on Facebook, I've learned from experience.
Maybe her and I aren't meant to be friends, maybe she doesn't want to be friends, and I respect that. But have you ever felt like there is so much more to say? Like you left things unfinished? Or maybe you're incomplete without them? All I know is that I'm not happy with the way things ended. I'm angry and want things to change, but we both can't change if we are both too stubborn. 

If you're reading this and since we aren't talking.. I want to just take the time to apologize. I'm sorry if I ever made you mad. I love you a lot. I don't understand how we both can forget that, AFTER EVERYTHING.  Forgive me?

I guess all I'm trying to say is, love those who love you and even those who don't. Forgive all, love all, smile at all, and keep chugging forward. Things might be dark now, but it can't rain forever.

Life.. It can either destroy you or save you..

Life. I don't really like it, but sometimes, once in a while, a bright light shines through the darkness. Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve happiness, but I know that's not true. I know that I deserve the world, and so do you. My bright light didn't come quickly or easily. I had to fight for it for years. I had to go through a lot of crap to get to where I am now. It wasn't easy. A lot of tears were shed, I was angry, I hated everything, but then I lost the true meaning of life.  I realized that we aren't here to be angry or hate everything. We're here to be happy and Heavenly Father sends people or things your way to make you happy. I always thought this life was here to test us and to make us upset so we could learn. I thought wrong. I realized that I'm not here to be upset, angry, or sad.. I'm here to be happy, and Heavenly Fathers knows that we can be happy through trials if we just listen to Him.  He knows what's right for us. All of our lives have different choices that we have to make, but they are made specifically for us. I believe that I'm stronger than I was a year ago, a month ago, and even a day ago. I've grown so much this year because of my Father in Heaven. He loves me more than anything. He wants what's best for me and I know that even if I make the wrong decision he'll still love me and love YOU. Keep your head up, beautiful. I know you got this.

I'm done with these earthly expectations..

I try to have people not worry about me, I try to let people know that I love them, I try to be there for everyone. But I'm tired of it. I WANT TO LIVE FOR ME. I have had so many people tell me how to live, who my friends should be, who my boyfriend should be, or even how I should dress. Let me tell you though, the expectations are killing me. Everything has finally come to the point where I don't even know myself anymore. I'm a mixture of so many people's expectations because my whole life, I've lived to please them.
Have any of you had a friend that you love so dearly but you don't know what to do? You don't know what to do about the friendship because you both have grown apart but you don't want to lose each other? I have. Have you ever just wondered where you're gonna go with your life after your parents let you go? I have. Have you ever fought with your parents because all they want to do is tell you who to be? I have. I'm fifteen and broken. I don't know where to go with my life and I'm scared.
I feel like there are a lot of experiences in my life I haven't gotten to experience because of the restrictions in my life. Let me tell you, I'm DONE. I'm living my life for me. I want everyone to love me, but if that means I don't love myself, then I have to be done pleasing everyone. I'm sorry if this hurts anyone, but I can't go on like this. A constant battle of right and wrong, that's what my life is.
I have a friend. This friend makes my day every day, but what if we're growing apart? What if I'm changing? What if I'm tired of being forced to be who this friend wants me to be? I'm not who this friend thinks I am. I'm different. I'm broken beyond repair and it kills me. I don't want to fake happy anymore. This friend tells me to show who I am for one day, then this friend judges me on it. Why? I don't know anymore. I hate highschool. I hate the choices I have to make. I wish I could just grow up already. I wish I could get a job, not have time for friends, and just enjoy my family.
Isn't this horrible? I want to skip the "best years of my life". Or maybe I just want them to change direction. I want to be happy, but I'm not heading into that direction. I want to live for a greater purpose. I want to serve Christ and be his hands on Earth. His expectations are the only ones that matter to me right now. He wants me to be happy, He wants to me to live, He wants me to serve, and He wants me to love. I can do all of this if people will stop judging others. Let everyone live. We're all stronger than we believe.
I know that I have a long way to go, but I'm striving to be who I need to be. My God is stronger than my problems. He gave me these problems for a reason.